April 18, 2021, 02:11:04 PM

Author Topic: Wake Me Up When This Promo Cycle Ends  (Read 692 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Arizona's Most Wanted

  • Member
  • Posts: 95
  • Karma: +0/-1
  • PS I Hate You
    • View Profile
Wake Me Up When This Promo Cycle Ends
« on: August 18, 2016, 04:49:09 AM »
[We fade in to our protagonist and hero, Adrian Tanner Junior on his way home from a busy day of winning pre-show dark matches like he said he would and preparing for the next one. He's wearing black workout shorts and a black t-shirt with "N O T O R I O U S" written in bold white font on the front, as he steps up to the front door of his house. Carrying a couple bags of groceries in one hand and the keys in the other, he struggles momentarily with the door lock before pushing the door open, to find-]

Brandon Young dressed like Junko Enoshima from Danganronpa complete with accurate Danganronpa set piece: In this school life of mutual winning, it's wrestle or be wrestled! Muahahahaha!

Adrian: Nope.

[Adrian promptly closes the door on that, and we cut out.

We cut back in shortly after. Everything is the same except our Hero is at a different door, which he also pushes open, this time finding-]

Brandon Young dressed like Snoop Dogg while "Fuck Wit Dre Day" plays on the stereo system: Bow wow wow yippy yo yippy yay
AT's in the motherfuckin hooooooouse

Adrian: Nope.

[Adrian sighs, shuts the door, and we fade out again.

Once more, we cut back in shortly after. Once more our Hero is at a different door, about to open it. He's already got it unlocked and ajar, he's just building up the energy to fully open it, expecting the worst in the process. Finally, he takes a deep breath and wincing, slowly shoves the door open.]

Brandon Young, standing atop a fake cardboard tower in the middle of the entrance to the house, waving a cowbell around loudly as he bellows out: Waaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiooooors, come out to plaaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy!

Adrian: Nooooooooooope.

[Anddddddddd the door shuts again.


Before we fade out a third time, the door is grabbed and thrown open again by our Secondary Hero and Manager Extraordinaire, Brandon Young. Brandon quickly steps in front of Adrian, barring him from leaving for a third time. Before Adrian has a chance to protest, Brandon begins to speak.]

Brandon: Alright look man, as your Manager Extraordinaire, I am trying to get you motivated for Promotional Videoing but ya just aren't even giving it a try today. What's up? Already having second thoughts about this return?

[The Arizona Assassin gives a deadpan look at his best friend-slash-brother-in-law-slash-"manager extraordinaire" before sighing and shaking his head.]

Adrian: Nothing's 'wrong' with me, man. No second thoughts, I'm in this to win this and all that-

Brandon: But?

Adrian: Buuuuut, I mean- Have you seen my opponent? Literally. Have you seen my opponent? Has anyone seen my opponent since he streamed his first promotional video on 4CW dot com (CHEAP POP!) like three weeks ago? Because I haven't. I mean I guess he showed up to beat Blaze in the match before mine last week but does that really count when either of them put as little effort as possible into their encounter? I had to follow that nothing match and do my best to drag Dads of our Lives and Anna Badstreet Single Female Lawyer to a watchable match at the same time. It's enough to drive a guy crazy.

[Our hero gives an exasperated shrug.]

Adrian: But the point is, where the fuck is Jonny Bedlam? And if Jonny bedlam doesn't care about our match then why should I? And I know the obvious answer is "its a wrestling match and you should care because you're in it" and yeah sure but, at least gimme something to work with! Here's the thing, I loooooooooaaaaaathed Sadism Incorporated and Father Knows Worst last show, but at least they tried! At least they made me give a shit- the slightest shit I could've possibly given but I gave one until my arm was raised in victory just like I said it would be!

But this guy?

[Our hero scratches the back of his head, a pained expression on his face.]

Adrian: I can't even be like the idiots last show and troll his bio on 4CW dot com because the only interesting tidbit is that  he's  actually known for walking out on feds out of nowhere! WHO PUTS THAT IN THEIR BIO?

[Adrian sighs, heavily.]

Adrian: If this guy doesn't care, then I can't either. Wrestling is my life, it's the thing that matters the most to me, and this type of blatant disrespect for the business would normally piss me off, but in this case I just- want to be done with it. I just want to stomp Jonny Bedlam into the mat and move onto bigger and obviously better things. So you ask if things are okay, Brandon? You wanna know why I haven't been motivated for this match beyond the usual training I do for every match?

Because me winning is already a foregone conclusion. This guy's already checked out mentally and it's seemingly a matter of time until he's checked out physically too. Why should I waste good jokes or material on a dude who just doesn't give a fuck?

The answer is: I shouldn't. I will of course train for the match like I do every match- like my life depended on it. Because it kinda does. But until Jonny Bedlam decides to show he gives any sort of a fuck about it? I'm just wasting my time, and wasting my breath. He's got a rep for doing this shit so why should I put my best into it when he won't?

[Our hero turns, staring directly into the camera.]

Adrian: Yes Jonny, this is me effectively calling you the fuck out.  Stop resting on your laurels, stop running away at the slightest hint of something not going your way. Y'know how you stop your rep of abandoning places? STOP ABANDONING PLACES. It ain't hard. Man up and deal with your problems like a real wrestler.

Or don't. I get paid either way.

[Another shrug.]

Adrian: Until Jonny Bedlam decides to care, this is Adrian Tanner... not. Caring, that is.

Keep on keepin' on and all that.

[F A D E.]
« Last Edit: August 18, 2016, 04:49:30 AM by RevolveR »