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Author Topic: The Will of One  (Read 464 times)

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Offline Arizona's Most Wanted

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The Will of One
« on: March 13, 2017, 04:57:06 AM »
"This is the tale of the Little Bronxy That Could(nt)."

Footage plays of a talking cgi toy train with Bronx's face morphed onto it's front.

"The Little Bronxy That Could(nt) liked to roam around the country with his friends in the General Now Train Co. "

Still shots of the rest of Gen Now with their faces morphed onto other trains.

"Despite the train cars being of fairly decent size, The Little Bronxy That Could(nt) didn't have a lot of passengers. This was because the General Now Train Co thought much higher of themselves and their train work than most other people did. Most people chose to ride with trains that actually accomplished things, which the General Now Train Co liked to say they knew how to  do, but putting it into practice was a different story."

Quick cut of the Little Bronxy That Could looking on wistfully as other, smaller trains rode down the same train lines filled to the brim with passengers while barely anyone sat inside his own train cars.

"But the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) didn't give up hope! He and the rest of his General Now Train Co friends believed that if you said something enough times surely it had to be true! Logic, facts, and the opinions of others be damned! As long as the General Now Train Co had each other, they were all winners in their own eyes!"

The members of the General Now Train Co obliviously pat each other on the backs for a job well done while other, better train models do their jobs for them. But hey at least they have each other!

"A worthy concept, in theory. In practice as well. Unfortunately for the General Now Train Co., winning was something that didn't come easy for them in theory or in practice.

But that didn't stop the Little Bronxy That Could(nt)! No sir! He was determined to pick himself up and make something of himself, get some of that sweet train car action! The Little Bronxy That Could(nt) gathered as many people into his train car as he could. It didn't matter where they were going or how far, or how dangerous the trek was, the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) would get them all home!

However, the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) didn't take into account that on that day, the route he wanted to travel was also being traversed by the Asshole Boyz."

Two more cgi trains appear further down the track from the Little Bronxy That Could(nt), their faces morphed to match Johnny Evil and Adrian Tanner Junior.

"The Asshole Boyz weren't that much bigger than the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) in size, but they were much stronger, faster, more agile, and just plain better than The Little Bronxy That Could(nt).

The Little Bronxy That Could(nt) wasn't deterred! he pushed forward with maximum speed. Surely if he just believed he'd survive than he would! So he ran headlong into the wall that the Asshole Boyz had made in the middle of the path with their train cars-"

Footage of the Little Bronxy That Could putting on as brave a face as he can as he charges forward down the train tracks into destiny.

Destiny and explosions.

"The Little Bronxy That Could(nt) hit the Asshole Boyz wall as hard as he could-

And watched in horror as he slammed face first into the wall and crashed, his train car igniting in a fiery explosion. The Little Bronxy That Could(nt) shut his eyes and ears to the sounds of screaming and burning coming from the passengers he had promised to bring to their destination and pushed onwards, ramming himself as hard as he could at the Asshole Boyz. But the Asshole Boyz didn't budge a wink. They just sat there and watched in awe and shock as the hundreds of people on the train car died horribly from the Little Bronxy That Could(nt)'s continued attempt to not be a total failure. They malicious about it (at least one of them), they just knew the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) didn't deserve to go past them and weren't going to let him do so. If people had to die screaming for that message to get to him and hopefully the rest of the General Now Train Co., then so be it."

The Asshole Boyz stare in shock and horror at the Little Bronxy That Could(nt)'s train car as he keeps pushing himself forward, gaining nothing in advancement.

"Finally, the Asshole Boyz could take no more. They'd watched enough suffering. They rolled themselves backwards slightly and then with all their might, slammed into the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) and sent him flying allllll the way back down the train tracks to the start where hopefully someone can help those poor passengers before it was too late,

Instead of medical attention, the rest of the General Now Train Co. joined him at the bottom, ignoring the screaming and the burning to pat the Little Bronxy That Could(nt) on the back for a job well done. "You'll get em next time" they said. "They're just jealous of how cool we are" one exclaimed. "They're just #milkdrinkers mang" another echoed. And it continued on, all oblivious to the obvious pain and suffering their existence caused.

But he wouldn't 'get em next time.'

He'd never 'get em.'

He wasn't good enough."


The scene opens up to show the inside of a comically-sized large vault with a giant gold door made to look like a circle with NW in jeweled lettering on the door. Inside the vault is a giant pool filled to the brim with various coins (but mostly nickels for continuity!). A diving board stands on the left side of the pool area where we see Cecil Kennedy preparing to take a dive. On the other side of the 'pool' we find your Hero and mine, Adrian Tanner Junior, sitting at a bench staring intently at a laptop.

Cecil: Geronimo!

The sound of a human body smashing into a giant pool of coins sounds about what you'd expect it to sound like in real life, which is to say it probably hurts a lot. Cecil winces as he glances up at Adrian from the pool of change.

Cecil: You comin' in? The ah, 'water's-

He coughs, some blood popping up from his mouth. He probably has internal bleeding. But the sake of the bit must be preserved!

Cecil: The water's... nice.

More coughing. Adrian looks over at his best friend, who gives the Arizona Assassin a thumbs up while holding back the obvious pain on his face, and waves him off.

Adrian: Yeah I'll be there in a sec. Gotta finish responding to these emails real quick.

The camera zooms in on the laptop, showing one of 'those emails,' from elismom @ gmail.com. The subject reads "lol u suk" and the body has "Dear Adrian, bronxys gonna win cus u suk lol."

A quick glance through his email history shows there are dozens, if not hundreds of emails from everyone's mothers. Everyone's. Because everything Adrian says in a promotional is totally literal.


The Arizona Assassin rolls his eyes and types a few notes, then hits send and closes the email program.

Adrian: Man, ya'll just can't help yourselves, can you? I knew full well Lauryn would jump all over my previous promo and suuuuure enough, she didn't disappoint one single bit. 

He shakes his head.

Adrian: I can't believe I'm about to say this- believe me I can't but, Genie's right.

He stops for a moment, quickly covering his mouth with his hand as his face turns slightly green.

Adrian: Oh god I just almost threw up a little.

Cecil: Same.

Adrian glances over at his friend.

Adrian: Yeah but in your case I'm pretty sure that's the internal bleeding.

...Why are you still in there?

Cecil: That's fair.

Cecil's eyes shut in pain for a second again.

Cecil: Can't... move. Nickels... where they shouldn't be. Don't wanna lodge further.

Adrian's brow quirks in concern.

Adrian: Do you... want some help?

Cecil: Nah I'll just... give it a bit.

Adrian: Alright, but if you need help just lemme know. But yeah even though I made this point awhile back, Genie's... right.

Oh god I almost threw up again.

You say one little thing about or in relation to Gen Now or any one of its members and one or all of you just HAVE to jump in and save face. You just HAVE to comment on it and make sure the people know your opinions on it and how they differ from other peoples.

That's not something that well adjusted people who believe in themselves and just want to "have the shots they've earned given to them" do, guys. That's what desperation smells like. That's what insecurity reeks of. People say shit about me all the time. Does it bother me? Sure, sometimes. Do I let it bother me? Let it rile me to the point where I HAVE to run to the tweet machines and make it a point to point what's been said about me that's WRONG, mang? No, because that's fucking sad. I don't need to defend myself against every tiny little thing said, I let my actions defend my words for me.

I would also like to, once again, point out how hilarious it is that a woman who calls herself the "trigger queen" can't stop herself from running to twitter and going HEY GUYS TANNER SAID I/YOU/WE SAID/DID THIS THING CAN YOU BELIEVE HIM???? Fuck it's half the reason why I do it. It would be the funniest thing to me if it wasn't also incredibly sad. Honestly at this point it feels like the trigger queen nickname is more about how triggered she gets by anyone saying anything mean about her or others than any attempts to do so of her own volition. 

The word of the day is Hyperbole, Lauryn. Look it up.

Cecil: That's assuming she knows how to read.

Adrian: True, she is a young'in. And because she's a young'in normally I'd give her a pass but jesus fucking christ this is like the fifth time she's done this. At some point it stops being "she's too young to know better" and starts being "she's just a fucking idiot."

And I know Bronxy's gonna jump on it, gonna try and use it against me because I mean, what the fuck else does he have to use against me? More sob stories about being a giant loser- sorry, an "underdog?" No he's gonna take all my hyperbole from the last promotional and run it into the ground and while he does so, miss the entire point. It might've been hyperbolic but there was nothing I said that wasn't true. Everyone's rooting for ol' Bronxy to beat me, everyone's rooting for Bronxy to get that one more shot, to finish what he started last year, to finally 'win the big one.'

And everyone is going to be wrong.

A twirl in his chair and a stern, hard look in the camera.

Adrian: I'm in a position to shut you up, that I am indeed. You won't shut up but I am indeed in that position. To knock you off- of what? What mountain have you climbed since returning? What pinnacle have you achieved since Winter Wasteland? What makes you special that beating you a second time is any different than the first? Oh I'm going to beat you, don't worry, but please. Enlighten me. I'll wait.

The Jeopardy waiting music starts to play as he does indeed wait.  A long moment passes by as he checks the imaginary watch on his wrist, rolls back over to his laptop to check some emails, take a sip of water.

Finally the buzzer goes off.

Adrian: Vannah, show us the answer please.

Vannah White rolls out on a moving platform with a small version of the Jeopardy board. She waves her hands at the letters on the board and they flash around to reveal the word


Adrian: Thank you Vannah.

Vannah White rolls back out of the shot.

Adrian: You're not even trying, man. Just rehashing the same shit over again. The 'cool edgy badass' schtick. Yeah I'm a cool badass, guess what? It works for me. It wins me matches, which is more than I can say for you. I made it a point in the tag match to say you were a good wrestler, you were the one person in the match I respected the most that wasn't Tara but again, that doesn't fit your world view of me. You can't take things like facts and logic and things IVE ACTUALLY SAID into account when you want to make me out to be the bad guy.

I'm not the one who lost the tag match though, was I?

He chuckles.

Adrian: You can't say I'm just 'more of the same' and then say the same shit to me everyone else does, Bronx. That's called being a hypocrite. I know big word probably too big for you. Ask Lauryn to look it up while she's looking up hyperbole. You guys can have a group English lesson. It'll be fun, make you feel useful for once.

What the fuck are you even talking about? Consistency. I'm the most consistent person on the damn roster that isn't maybe Eli or Marquis.  I fight week to week but I don't 'live' week to week, whatever that even means. New people equal new things to say, new ways to take them down, I don't know how that's hard to comprehend. It's not 'living week to week' it's just living. Something you might wanna try some time.

He shakes his head, again.

Adrian: Are you really going this route, Bronx? A chameleon? Really?

Cecil: Really.

Adrian: Your boy Bry Bry tried this shit with me and I shut him down so lemme shut you down too. I don't know where you people get this 'I say what's popular' shit from. For someone who claims he did a bunch of research into my promos you sure didn't pay attention to any of them. I make jokes about memes and pop culture because that's my personality but the MESSAGE, the MESSAGE has been the same since day motherfucking ONE, fucker. The message is clean and simple. I am the BEST Light Heavyweight In This Business. And I spend every waking moment trying to PROVE that as a fact beyond a shadow of a doubt. I don't know how you could've watched a bunch of my promos and seen anything different. It's the tag line at the end 3/4s of the goddamn time!

But again, anything that doesn't fit into your own world view gets ignored and replaced. It's how people like you, and the rest of your group operate. You separate out the facts, the reality of the situation and you twist that reality to fit your own. I've done nothing but say since day one what my goals were in coming to this company. My ability to talk circles around people on a week to week basis does not mean I'm 'living week to week' it means I'm doing my JOB. And I'm damn good at my job. Again, things I mention every single promotional. Are you getting the idea yet?

Jesus these people. Lord, give me strength.

He rolls his eyes.

Adrian: You know who claim to be 'high intellectual' than other people? People who aren't that. And you- you are not that. You are not smarter than me, Bronx. You are not better than me, you are not better looking than me, you are not 'anything' than me, aside from maybe "a better loser."

You keep using all this insider terminology like it's supposed to make you smarter but again, that ain't how it works. Everyone and their mother's concerned with the 'shoots' because it's a PART OF THE GAME. It's just as important to get inside your head from a verbal standpoint as it to wreck you from a physical standpoint. Because if you can do one, you can surely do the other. I don't think you can do either, bronx. Not to me. Not here, not now.

Again with the consistency nonsense which again just goes to show how little of me you actually paid attention to. You might've read a few of my promos but you certainly didn't understand then and you clearly haven't paid attention to anything else that's happened with me in this company.

I am the hardest fucking worker in this goddamn company, you fucking twit. For you to even ASK if people can depend on me shows how LITTLE you actually understand, though that shocks me none. I live my LIFE for this business. I live and DIE by this business, I have missed ONE show in eight months and that was due to shit I won't go into. Every single goddamn day I am in that ring busting my ass, working to make myself better, faster, stronger, I am the Six Million Dollar Man only there is no bionic parts on me. The greatness that I've busted my ASS for over ten years to create is au natural.

Talk about fucking consistency and then pull THIS bullshit on me? Nah son, you don't get to roll like that. The FACT that Evil and I worked so well together PROVES just how consistent I am, PROVES what I can do in that ring. We worked better as a team while we hate each other than we ever did when we were friends. THAT's consistency, bitch. That's MY hard work and dedication going into that tag title match that MADE us work like a goddamn machine, that's the chemistry we have together that only comes through putting in the effort needed to MAKE it work, whether you like the other guy or not.

But sure, make more gay jokes. That always works out well for other people.

The longest, hardest, eye roll possible. Longer than ever before, even.

Adrian: People get mad when they lose to you because by all merits nobody should lose to you if THIS is what you're gonna throw at them. I am a student of the game, the game I grew up in, the game I have lived almost my entire life. Yeah I'm a cocky asshole sometimes- a lot of times- but that was EARNED through blood, sweat, and tears. Just like this tournament will be. Just like me putting you down like the Dimestore Kilroy Evans that you are will be done. I have never made a SINGLE note of contention to ever taking things the easy way and yet that's all you've harped on this entire time. You can't see the forest from the trees.

But it's okay, you'll see one thing real up close real easy come match.

Namely the mat, with your face.

I don't give a shit what you think of me, Bronx. I don't care about the lame rehashed gay jokes, the lame rehashed 'you do pop culture references' jokes, the lame rehashed 'you rip people apart so that MUST mean you're not taking the game seriously' joke.

The only thing I care about is winning.

There's the smirk.

Adrian: Winning is what I do. Better than 95% of people out there today and yesterday, and the day before that. Wanna talk consistency? Go look at the fucking record books, you fucking joke.

When I say I'm going to do something I DO it. There is rarely any ifs ands or buts about it. I have put my life on the line for this business and I am not going to stop now. Not when I am so, so close to that 4CW Title. Not when I can crush the dreams of yet another never-was into oblivion where they belong and walk into the next round KNOWING that I am what I say I am.

Not that I didn't know that already. But maybe, just maybe, when it's all said and done you'll know it too. But I'm not counting on it because again, world view, yours sucks and makes no sense.

Mine is clear and ready to shine.  I have no remorse for what I'm about to do. I feel no shame for the metaphorical life I'm about to take, the dream I'm about to crush. I did at one point but, you saw fit to end that real quick.

He points the finger gun directly at the camera, eyes glaring a hole through it as he 'fires.'

Adrian: Bang bang, mother bitch. You go dead now.

You're gonna carry that weight.