August 04, 2020, 12:46:47 PM

Author Topic: What's their name? I didn't get it the first 500 times they said it!  (Read 244 times)

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Offline Jman2k3

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As the image comes into focus the first thing that is clear to see is a white name tag that has the usual, “Hi, My Name is……” written in scarlet lettering and in black sharpie Scott Stevens. As the image zooms out slowly we see that the Texan is sitting behind a wooden desk. Stevens is wearing your classic white button up shirt and black tie with his hair spiked up and combed to the side in your classic Jett Wilder douche look, but most importantly he’s wearing a smile that would creep out any normal person unless your name is Drew. Stevens leans forward onto the desk and begins speaking.

“Hi there ladies and gents, but I just want to inform you that my name is Scott Stevens.”

Stevens introduces himself and points to his name tag.

“Yes indeed, the same Scott Stevens that popped out of a dumpster humming the theme song of Captain Planet as I captured the Extreme championship one year ago. I am also that same Scott Stevens that tricked Brian Hollywood into thinking he was fighting Jason P. Davidson while I wore a hazmat suit as I become one-third of your tag team champions as I and the Davidsons defeated New Gen Rising.”

Stevens taps his name tag.

“And I am that same Scott Stevens that was a heartbeat away from becoming YOUR 4CW World champion. You could say I softened him up for Bronx.”

Stevens says with a light chuckle.

“Just remember the name folks, Scott Stevens, because if you don’t then I’ll have to get more giant banners like the one behind me.”

Stevens says as he points behind him and we see the name, “SCOTT STEVENS” in black lettering on a giant white banner hanging from the ceiling.

“I’ll have to demand new t-shirts be made that have my name on them so you can remember it forever!”

Stevens yells as he slaps the top of the desk before calming himself. Stevens looks around and motions for the camera to zoom in.

“Or I’ll have to bring back the, “Vote 4 Stevens” campaign, and we all know we don’t want that to happen.”

Stevens says with a nod and a whisper as the camera zooms slowly. Stevens slowly raises his hands and puts his hands on the top of the desk and pushes himself slowly back to provide him with enough room to stand before slowly making his way to the front of the desk. Stevens leans against the smooth wooden finish as he looks at his name tag before slowly pulling it from his white shirt as it grasps to continue to stay on but it’s life is slowly ended as one final pull stood between the shirt and being crumpled up and thrown into the mesh waste basket next to the desk.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I don’t need to inform you of who I am because you already know who I am.”

Stevens says sternly with coldness in his tone.

“However, our opponents on the upcoming Adrenaline card, the KGB, who are suppose to be renowned for their global tag team supremacy are constantly telling people to look them up and are labeled in so much stuff with, “ KGB” on it you would think it would be tattooed or branded on their forehead as well.”

Stevens says before he begins to slowly stroke his beard.

“They say they don’t know who Scotty and myself are which is possible since we aren’t really a standard tag team, but I’ve never heard of you either. I mean for a team that’s suppose to be known for tag wrestling I’ve never heard of the KGB…..I take that back.”

Stevens corrects himself before continuing.

“I have heard of the KGB just like everyone as and the KGB that everyone has heard of isn’t your silly little tag team but the real KGB from Russia, and I highly doubt one of you to numb nuts is from Russia.”

Stevens says before motioning to the camera to zoom in.

“I mean did you learn about it in school or steal it from a movie and the light bulb went off and you two were like that would be a cool name for a tag team? It’s ok, you can tell me, I won’t judge….much.”

Stevens says with a smirk.

“I mean I don’t know if I should take you seriously or give you fifty cents and tell you to work on your comedy act.”

Stevens says with a shrug.

“It’s KGB this and KGB that, and all I’m waiting for is one of you to pull a Drago and tell the world that you two are going to break Scotty and I and that if we die we die.”

Stevens says shaking his head.

“Let’s start with Mr. Hardkore World himself, James Fierce……yeah I can’t take you seriously.”

Stevens says bluntly before sighing.

“You spell hardcore with a “K” and you expect people to not laugh at you? This isn’t ninety-six and you’re not twelve. You’re about as cool as Limp Bizkit right now. So from what I’ve learned you’re hardcore with a “K.””

Stevens says as he rolls his eyes.

“And fierce!”

Stevens says as he mocks with cat paws and a hiss.

“You’re fierce with it comes to unstopping toilet bowls? You’re fiercely quicker than a rabbit fucking? What makes you fierce James? If that is even your real name.”

Stevens says as he throws up his hands confused.

“And lastly you’re some sort of bandit, really? You’re going to come rob me and Scotty of a victory on Adrenaline? Are you going to do it wearing a cowboy hat and a cute little bandana covering your faces? I’m sure it’ll have KGB plastered all over it to remind everyone of who you are. Now that would be an entertaining sight to see.”

Stevens says with a nod before reaching into the back pocket of his black slacks and produces a piece of paper.

“Next we have……really?”

Stevens says before clearing his throat.

“The Suit! The Big Bad Bustling Bandit! The Master of the Powerslam! The Sovereign of SWAT! The Skill to Thrill! The Name to Entertain! Loud and proud, and well Endowed! "Mad Dog" Paul Soutter!”

Stevens finishes his introduction which I’m sure has put everyone to sleep, but thus continues on because he’s a serious professional.

“Jatt still has him beat on the nickname front.”

Stevens says with a chuckle before crumpling the paper up and tossing it into the trash.

“I don’t know if I should bend the knee or shake in my boots when I step into the ring with Paul Soutter. I mean everyone is so afraid of a career threatening move like the powerslam that they must walk on egg shells when they are near you. Wouldn’t the Sovereign of SWAT be the guy who bounced your paychecks?”

Stevens questions with a shrug.

“And just like his partner I can’t take this guy seriously because he either tries too hard to be funny or he’s seriously retarded and I don’t beat up retards because it’s not right. You say you have a victims list longer than your Johnson.”

Stevens says with a puzzled look.

“So you’re saying your dick is short because when you’re four hundred pounds everyone knows you haven’t seen your feet much less your dick since the first trimester.”

Stevens says before having a seat on the desk.

“I mean you’re contradicting yourself when you said you’re well endowed and your strap-on you use to fuck your partner doesn’t count.”

Stevens says as he looks at the ceiling before releasing a sigh.

“You two say you know nothing of Scott Woodson and I and the only three things you need to know about is first, we hate each other. We have literally tried to kill one another as I tried to run him over and he stabbed me in the heart. He kidnapped my family and I tried to skin him alive. If we did this to each other what do you think we will do to you? The second is that we strive to be the best no matter what. This mutual aspect has brought us together rarely and when we have it has produced successful results. Two men that hate each other but when they have a common goal win more than Charlie Sheen after a coke binge. In Scotland, you will have two guys come out there who aren’t still living in the nineties and don’t need ridiculous catchphrases and nicknames to get themselves over because our actions speak louder than words. You claim to break necks but bones heal and I’ve already ended two careers in 4CW in my first year and my pal Scotty gets a hard on for crucifying people. Weird I know, but everyone has their quirks. The last and most importantly thing you need to know is that…….”

Stevens cups his hands around his mouth and begins shouting.

“ALL KGB MERCHANDISE WILL BE NINETY PERCENT OFF WHEN THEY ARE ELIMINATED ON ADRENALINE AND ONE PERCENT OF THOSE SALES WILL GO TO THE INJURED AND CRIPPLED WRESTLERS FUND!”

As Stevens lowers his hands the fun and games is over as his expression has turned from fun to serious.

“See you in Scotland boys.”